


It's Your Curls! (And You)

by White_Nails



Category: Baseball RPF
Genre: Aggressive love of curly hair, Alternate Universe - No Girlfriends/No Wives, Chicago Cubs, Curly hair kink, I don't watch the Cardinals, Implied Hoerner/Carpenter, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Not Beta Read, Please Don't Take This Seriously, Please be gentle, Sex Jokes, St. Louis Cardinals, We Die Like Men, really ooc, this is my first fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-22
Updated: 2020-08-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:47:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26036644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/White_Nails/pseuds/White_Nails
Summary: Are you looking for a Bader/Happ fanfiction?  No?  To bad because I have suffered with this idea for days, so if I have to suffer so do you.In all seriousness thought this is the summary:Ian Happ has accepted the fact that his teammates know him well.  He has also accepted the fact that his teammates know about his "thing" for curly hair.  Heck he's even accepted that his "thing" has lead to his full blown crush on Harrison Bader (of all people).  Just because he's accepted it though doesn't mean he's going to say anything.But Nico couldn't keep his mouth shut could he?
Relationships: Ian Happ/Harrison Bader
Kudos: 2





	It's Your Curls! (And You)

**Author's Note:**

> Seriously, this is a work of fiction (though a pretty strange one). I don't know any of the people in this and if you do know any of them or are any of them, please don't read this. 
> 
> I mean this in good fun so please don't take this seriously. And I don't think it needs to be said, but this is OOC for obvious reasons.
> 
> Also, I'm sorry to all Cardinals fans, I don't watch the team and the only guy I like on the team is Bader.

Most people didn't know Ian very well, and he liked it like that. He enjoyed the fact that he was a Chicago Cub but that he was also able to blend in with the shadows. Rizzo, Bryant, Baez, and Contreras took the spot light and got to sign all the memorabilia, and Ian stood on the side, smiled and took a few pictures every once and a while. But the public was not a part of the team, and the Cubs were a close team, almost like a family, and they knew a lot more about Ian that he was usually comfortable with other's knowing. Like how Ian was more into guys then girls, or how he had a thing for really curly hair, or his gigantic rookie crushes on both Rizz and Patrick Kane. (He blamed both of those crushes on the curly hair thing all the time.) And because they all knew one another so well, it didn't take long for Rizzo (because of course it was Rizz) to figure out that, after getting over some terrible rookie crushes, Ian had a terrible, no good, very bad crush on Harrison Bader. The Cardinal's center fielder who finally figured out who to do his hair, and those curls were Ian's goddamn downfall. Thankfully Rizzo wasn't a total dick all the time, and he wouldn't ever joke about someone's sexuality and out them, but the knowing looks that had been thrown at Ian when the clubhouse was getting ready for the first game of the double header against the Cardinal's were enough to convince Ian that maybe, if the other's paid a bit more attention, they'd know what Rizzo did.  
But Ian didn't have time to worry, so he set out to take some quick BP swings and get his usual routine finished. Once his BP time was up he headed back into the clubhouse for his usual walk around the stadium as a way to clear his mind. It was his way of getting focused, he was alone and in his own head calming his nerves and just mentally clicking into the game. As he made is way closer to the opposing team's clubhouse he was ready to take a turn so that he wouldn't go by the Cardinal's when he ran head first into someone else. He would have fallen backwards had said person not grabbed him around the waist, so here he was, currently being held at the waist by someone who almost knocked him to the ground.  
"Happer, you really should pay attention to your surrounding more!"  
"Oh, hey Hoerner, sorry about that, I wasn't really paying attention. What are you doing out here anyway? Shouldn't you be at BP?"  
"I was but I'm pretty sure it's Boat's AB right now. I left after Tony started." Nico stated as he let go of Ian once he was assured that he wouldn't fall over.  
"Makes sense, you were standing next to Kris right, he always gets all moony-eyed and sappy when Rizzo starts his AB's."  
"I don't know why you're talking, from what I've heard you used to be exactly like that when you were a rookie."  
"Who told you that!"  
"Well you did, just now, but I always had a hunch especially because of your love for Kane, and let's be honest dude, the real catch on that team is Toews anyways."  
"Hold up, you're into older guys?"  
"None of your business, but this isn't about me, it's about your weird obsession with curly hair."  
"I do not have a-a thing for curly hair!" The indignation in Ian's voice was almost palpable, but that wouldn't stop Nico from chirping him.  
"Oh you totally do-" Though, before Nico could continue pestering him they heard the opposing team clubhouse door open and out walked Matt Carpenter with his mask on and half dressed for the game already. "Do need to talk to Rizzo, seriously. Uh, morning Carpenter." Said man looked at both Cubs and shook his head slightly.  
"You really should have private conversations by your own clubhouse door." Was all Carpenter ended up saying while looking Ian dead in the eyes. Ian didn't really know if he should hold the gaze, but a second later, Carpenter nodded to himself and headed back into the away team clubhouse.  
"What the fuck, what the fuck, what the fuck!" Here it was, the dread Ian hoped he'd never feel. One of the opposing teams players may only know about Ian's hair thing, which on it's own was mortifying, but Carpenter wasn't a stupid man, and from the way he stared at him he was almost positive that it wasn't the hair thing he had figured out. It was the sexuality thing and Ian was fucked.  
"Hey, Happer, calm down we don't even know if Carpenter knows about you or anything." Nico was trying to act as some type of voice of reason, but he didn't have to stare into the eyes of someone who figured out his deepest darkest secret. Ian had been fine with the Cubs knowing, they were bound to find out, but the opposing team that just so happened to be the CARDINAL'S was bad. He didn't even give Nico a response as he headed back down his usual walk, wanting to just sit in his cubbie and be alone for a while.  
*Inside the Cardinal's clubhouse*  
"So, you'll never guess what I heard about today." Carpenter stated as he plopped himself down right next to Bader's cubbie.  
"I'm sure you won't give me much of a choice?"  
"Oh, come on Harry, you'll really want to know what's going on!" The overly cheerful tone in Matt's voice was what made Harrison look up and instantly regret it. Matt only got that look in his eye unless he was up to something and Harrison wasn't in the mood today. He didn't think he'd be down for mischief at all this road series actually, but he wasn't about to let Carpenter know that, not if he could help it. "Well, anyway, I heard from a little rookie that your favorite center fielder is into guys with really nice, curly hair." This was whispered near Harrison's ear, because even if what was said was slightly muffled because of masks, Carpenter at least had enough respect and understanding to not accidentally out someone.  
"He is not my favorite center fielder! For fucks sake I don't even like him that much!" Harrison, at this point, was whisper yelling. He was out with the team, they had figured it out back when he was a rookie himself, and they had a tendency to want to set him up with others in the league. He thought it was sweet in its own twisted way, but it got tiring after a while.  
"Oh really, so you wouldn't mind if I tried to get him back here later on would you?"  
"Well-"  
"Maybe after the game, when he's all sweaty, and who knows, maybe the game gets him all hot and bothered."  
"Carp-"  
"Do you think he's had sex with other ballplayers, or is he the type to only pick up when it's someone from outside the league? Do you think I could get him addicted to the Cardinal way, if you know what I mean." Adding the eyebrow wiggle and the suggestive movement made the comment even worse, and it made Bader's blood boil. "Huh, whats wrong Harry, I thought you didn't like him? Unless you wanna help me 'convince' him to spend some quality time with us?"  
"Absolutely not! I don't share!" Harrison shouted, he was pissed off. How dare Carpenter imply that he could have his nasty way with Ian, like he was just some piece of meat that could shared with whoever wanted a bit.  
"I thought you didn't like him?"  
"Fuck off Carp!" And with that Harrison stormed off, ready to go hit the weight room and punch the shit out of some poor bag, just barely remembering to grab his mask. As he stormed out into the hallway stewing in his mix of jealous and righteous anger he let his feet lead him to the weight room, but as he rounded the last corner he ran right into someone else. "What the fuck, watch it!" And as Bader was ready to rip into whoever had the misfortune of being on the receiving end of his anger he realized it was the same center fielder he didn't want to see.  
"Jesus, you don't have to be such an asshole about it, besides you're the one that stormed around the corner and ran into me!" Ian was actually on the floor this time, because of course he was, and because the universe hated him he was on the floor because Harrison. God, was he a murderer in his past life or something because if not what did he do to deserve any of this today?  
"Look, sorry, let me help you up." With that, Harrison extended his hand to the current Cub on the floor, which Ian took with no problem. Because it was no problem, until someone else rounded the corner startling them both and instead of Ian standing like normal, he lunged forward right into Harrison. More specifically right into Bader's right shoulder and onto all the little curls that lay there. Yep, he defiantly had to have killed someone because he didn't deserve this. What Ian had not been expecting was to feel Bader wrap his right arm around his waist and he certainly wasn't expecting the low, angry "Mine." That was directed at whom ever had come around the corner.  
"Aw, come on Harry, you really don't wanna share?"  
"Huh," Ian thought, "Of course it was Carpenter who caused this, because nothing can go my way. God, I just hope the game isn't as much of a shit show as this."  
"Carp, you can fuck right off." It was said with such conviction that Ian worried about what was actually going on in the Cardinal's dugout.  
"Oh please Harry, you knew I was joking anyway, lighten up now."  
"Yeah sure, whatever you say." The arm around his waist almost seemed to get tighter, which was confusing to Ian, but it wasn't like he was going to complain. And if he maybe, sort of, nuzzled a little closer to Harrison's neck and hair, that was his business.  
"For Christ sake, you joke about wanting to fuck your teammates crush and suddenly you're the villain!"  
"So he's interested in someone," Ian thought, "Guess I've gotta get over this crush then..."  
"It's not like you have a history of going after young blonde's or anything." Bader snapped back the annoyance in his voice almost tangible.  
"I mean, guilty as charged, but let's be honest here, it's the second base boy for me."  
"I play second!" Because if they were going to talk about him without acknowledging that he was still there he was going to make them remember his presence.  
"Let me handle this babe."  
"Babe? But Carpenter just said you were into-WAIT! ME!"  
"Yes, now shush for a second." That was whispered into his ear, for only Ian to hear. "Now, Matt, if you'll excuse us we have some stuff to talk about." With his arm still across Ian's waist, Harrison lead Ian away from the corner, but not before hearing Carpenter shout,  
"Talking is what we're calling it now? Just remember we have a game soon!"  
"Ignore him," Bader was still whispering, "He's just frustrated and needs to get laid."  
"Yeah, as long as it's not our rookie they it'll be fine."  
"Don't tell him that, he'll take it as a challenge."  
"Anyway, what are we actually going to do? About this I mean?" Placing his own hand over the one still wrapped around his waist.  
"Well, if this goes the way I want it to, you'll agree to get takeout with me? I might not be able to have you over at the hotel we're staying at, but if you don't mind, we stay at your's I pay for the food? Afterwards we could do whatever you want, but if it's up to me we stay in the sheets until the game tomorrow."  
"Is that all you want though?"  
"No, I want anything and everything you'll give me."  
"If I wanted everything?"  
"I'd give it to you."  
"Then I'll take you up on that, but first I want to know why you were so made at Carpenter."  
"He said some shit in the clubhouse, that's all I'm going to tell you for now, but now I have a question for you."  
"Shoot!"  
"Do you really have a thing for curls?"  
"What! Of course not!"  
"Then why are you so red?"  
"That's two questions!"  
"Yeah, it is." The little smile that crossed Harrison's face made Ian's insides melt. And right as he was about to say something else, Harrison placed a small kiss right at the corner of his mouth. If his inside's had been melting before, they were liquefied now. "Forget I asked." Ian didn't know if it was possible to want forever already, but he really hoped he could have it.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you were at least entertained by this, and please be nice, it is my first fic afterall.


End file.
